Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Love Bites

Available on Amazon
Sometimes, love hurts.  As wonderful as it is to love and be loved, it’s equally painful.  It can be a lover, a sister, a friend, a cousin.   A friend once told me that if it hurts, it isn’t love, but I’m not so sure about that.

See, when you love someone, you become vulnerable, because to be able to love, you must let down your defenses.  You can’t love someone from behind your castle walls.  Sorry. It just doesn’t work that way. And when you lower your drawbridge, and your knight in shining armor crosses the moat, well, it’s not always a fairytale.  Sometimes it’s more like a paranormal romance. Like Olivia Hardin’s Bitten Shame, maybe.

I read this book while I was going through some love hurts moments with a family member.  As I was fielding emails and texts and phone calls on the latest drama, I buried my head in Jill’s world. I oscillated between her past
– where the love of her life, Doc, lives—and her present – where she lives half a life.  And I cried.  I have to say, a book gets a special place on my virtual shelf when it can move me. And this book moved me at a time when I needed a good excuse to cry.

Jill is a vampire, struggling with loneliness, heartbreak and regret.  I dig it. The struggles, I mean.  I can only imagine the vampire problems, but the other stuff, yeah, check. And then there's the whole sadness about...well, I won't give it away, but it broke my heart to know the regret she lived with.  So much regret that she wasn't sure life -such as it is- was worth struggling with, anymore.  And in the midst of all this, I admire how she loves – with all her might, even when she’s angry.  And with a deep compassion.

As a vampire, she wrestles with the darkness inside her and its a battle she almost loses, in more than one way.

We all struggle with this darkness. My family member is struggling with darkness and I am struggling with it, too.  And every day I choose to love this person, just as Jill and Doc in Bitten Shame chose to love each other.  And along with choosing to love someone, we have to make choices to stick with the light.  And we don't always.  We fall from grace and say something we regret or do something we wish we hadn't.  But here's the key, the more choices we make to stay with the light, the easier it becomes and the further away the darkness recedes.  Jill learns about this.

And, thank god Olivia Hardin has such a great talent for blending the deep emotional stuff with light-hearted humor.  Even though I was right there in the trenches with Jill, I was also so glad to be there when she’s dancing and cracking jokes and painting.  Olivia plays with the light and dark and the picture she paints is beautiful *sniff*.  So when the dark stuff takes over, I know I won’t drown in it.

When we do get dragged down by the pain we have to deal with, we shadow-box with it, and so does Jill.  She certainly fights her demons, and I fought alongside her, tapping away on my smartphone, refusing to give up, refusing to fight with my loved one.  I told them, “What are you hurt about? Because I’ve always loved you and stood up for you?  Don’t pick a fight with me, because I won’t fight with you. I’m just going to love you. So there.”

I know, real mature, right?  Well, maybe it is, I don’t know. I don’t have the answer, and neither did Jill. But someone else might…Well, read the book.  You won’t be disappointed.

And, hey, there is light out there and in you. Hold on to it with everything you’ve got.  You never know, that star you wish on might bring you what you need, if not what you want.  We can’t have everything, can we?

Much love and light to you!

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